Everything that follows is fiction.....
I went to an interview this morning in a fictional town called clitville, I'm not sure how I did.
I'm sitting here waiting for the call from the employment agency.
I'm really anxious because I really want this job, not as a career move because it's just another laborious production job, I want it so I can work days and have my evenings free,and I also want to get away from my torturous boss who is a bit of a sadist.
I will devastated if I dont get the job, it will mean going back into HELL where I currently work, back there, oh god, where it's dark, where dreams are shattered and stood on and spat on.
Where you kiss goodbye to your life.
The interview went okay, but we hit a snag in my employment record. He looked at my C.V. and was puzzled as to why I had so many jobs. He was looking for someone solid, someone reliable, he didn't want someone who would jump ship at the drop of a hat. What could I tell him? I told him I wanted longevity and security and I was getting old now so I didn't want to look for anything else, I don't think he bought it.
Actually he would be wrong, if this job is as easy as it looks, I'd love to be there for life, and do my comedy and music on the night, it's ideal, I would have an ideal life.
What do you say when your C.V. looks like a piece of shit? I think this interviewers face would lighten up if I handed him a piece of shit.
I have done many jobs,and I have a reasons for leaving them all, whether it be a temporary contract, redundancy or slightly better prospects and opportunities, I have left them all. So most of it was out of my hands and some I made choices over, and on two pages it looks like I average a new job every 2 to 3 years.. Well what can I say? There's nothing I can do to change it. Maybe we shouldn't look at it as a negative thing and look at it as a positive thing. It shows I can adapt to change, and have experienced many different manufacturing environments and have worked as part of a team in each and every one. So that's a good thing. You may have a man who has been at the same company since the age of 19 to 65, that's great, it shows commitment, loyalty and so on, but maybe he can't adapt so well to change. I believe I can.
What do you get at the end of it all anyway?? At the end of 40 years as an assembly worker or production / process operator?? You may get a watch or carriage clock by the company, they'll cost less than £100. And maybe a thankyou from the chairman, delivering empty words to you, words that mean nothing to him, he's just going through his yearly presentation, going through the motions like a magician learns and performs his routine, that's all your'e seeing, and you'd be very naive to believe everything they say, if you do, then you're stupid, and you've probably wasted your life in a place that doesnt really appreciate you as much as they claim to be (during the speech), I hope I never hear one of those speeches to me, oh god I would collapse.
I've worked 20 years in dead end jobs, it's hard to be enthusiastic about it, there's NOTHING fulfilling or interesting about them, maybe for the first 10 minutes yes, but afterwards its a laborious sweaty production line, why should anyone be interested in it?
I make no apologies for not being interested in it.
TO MY CURRENT EMPLOYER.....ALL OF THE ABOVE IS FICTION.
